do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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