is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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