why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
she pinky promised me she was 18
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
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