Sry I called you an 8
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
