if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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