Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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