stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
