every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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