i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize