I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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