Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
We had to coat check the pizza.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
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