Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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