That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize