she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
