SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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