i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
