I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
