we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
