She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
