Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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