can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
