hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
