He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
