I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
