Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
