That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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