sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize