so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
