sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Randomize
