You kept calling me your small dog last night.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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