Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
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