But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
