if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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