So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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