Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
