ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
