My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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