well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
