Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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