He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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