I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
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