I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize