This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
