so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
