Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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