i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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