Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
