is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Randomize
