the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I showed him my bush... on skype.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Randomize
