Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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