haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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